


We Won't Have to Give Up a Thing (We'll Stay Who We Are)

by Chash



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Foster Care
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-17
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-03-06 06:00:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13404936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chash/pseuds/Chash
Summary: When her social worker calls with news, Clarke doesn't have any reason to think it might bebadnews. The adoption process is going well, everything should be right on schedule.She's not expecting to find out that Madi's uncle has come into the picture. He's had thirteen years to claim her, after all. She doesn't see why he's trying to do itnow.





	We Won't Have to Give Up a Thing (We'll Stay Who We Are)

**Author's Note:**

> I did my best with googling foster care stuff, but it was not very helpful, so I just winged it. If things do not line up with the real world, I'm fine with that.

Clarke’s expecting good news when she sees Luna’s number light up her display. It should be good news, by all rights. She and Madi are doing well, and everything on their end is proceeding according to schedule. There’s no rational reason for her to worry, but that shouldn’t stop her. She’s great at expecting the worst.

But for once, she's optimistic, and picks up with a cheerful, “Hi, Luna, what’s up?” so her heart doesn’t sink until the pause goes on just a little too long.

“I have news,” she says, delicate.

“Bad news?”

“I don’t think it’s bad.”

Her voice is still too careful, and Clarke sits down, taking deep, even breaths.

She wasn’t expecting to want to keep Madi. She hadn’t really been expecting to want to adopt at all when she became a foster parent. She just wanted to help, be a roof over some kid’s head while they got their lives sorted out. But Madi doesn’t have anyone else. Her whole life has been getting bounced around, starting with being given up for adoption at birth. She had a good family for the first few years of her life, but her mother died in a car crash and then her father fell into grief and passed away himself, and she was back in the system by age four. Ever since, she’s been jumping from one placement to another, and Clarke is ready to be her last one. She deserves it.

“Okay, but you’re calling me, so--”

“A man claiming to be Madi’s uncle has stepped forward. He’s interested in meeting her, possibly taking her on himself.”

Her first reaction is anger, quick and bright, this flash of resentment that after thirteen years, some guy would just appear out of nowhere.

But as always, her rational mind kicks in. Madi’s biological mother was young, under eighteen. She doesn’t know if the father even knew about the baby. And if he’s interested in adopting a thirteen-year-old kid, that’s—

He probably isn’t really interested in that. He probably has no idea what he’d be taking on.

“And he’d get her,” she says, making herself say the words out loud.

“We try to place children with their biological families whenever possible," says Luna, like she's rehearsed it. She probably says it a lot. Clarke gets the theoretical intent of the law, but it feels like Madi's family should have already had their chance, when she was born. It doesn't feel like this should be coming back _now_.

“She was adopted, right? Legally, does that—isn’t he not her family anymore?”

“The legalities are complicated. It wasn’t a closed adoption, and the mother didn't waive all her rights." She sighs. "Our system is still traditional in a lot of ways.”

 _Traditional_ is often code for bullshit, in Clarke’s experience.

“It just seems weird to me, that we’re supposed to think it’s better for her to go with some stranger she’s never met just because they share some DNA.”

“I’m aware, yes. He just wants to meet you, to start with.”

“Me?”

“He asked about her current situation, I told him she was living in foster care. If everything seems to be in order, he might not even try for custody.”

In theory, Clarke had known when this started that a family member could derail it, but she also knew it was unlikely. Madi’s family has spent thirteen years not wanting her.

“So, he gets to decide if I take her or not?”

“It’s not like that. But if he wants custody, it would make things more complicated for you. It’s not impossible that you’d win if it went to court, but—“

Clarke closes her eyes, leaning back. If Madi’s uncle wants to fight her in court, that’s time and money and probably a lost cause, but she’d still do it. She doesn’t want Madi to think she’d just give up without a fight.

“So, he wants to meet me,” she says. “When? Should I bring Madi?”

“I think just the two of you to start,” says Luna. “He’s local, but he teaches high school, so his schedule isn’t as flexible as yours.”

Clarke’s stomach twists. Teaching is an occupation that will probably make him look good, if this becomes a fight. But she’s probably better off financially.

 _Maybe he can’t afford to fight me for her_ isn’t exactly a thought she’s proud of having, but at least it's a comforting one.

“He said he could make it to the office after school any day this week. Could you come in today? Three-thirty?”

“I could. Can I tell Madi?”

“Of course. I know this isn’t something you wanted to hear, Clarke,” she adds, voice going gentle. “But I still don’t think it’s bad news. He seemed like a good guy. And it would be nice for Madi.”

Clarke can’t help bristling at that. It might be nice for Madi, but this uncle is another stranger, another in a long line of people who may or may not really want to care for her. What if he’s not ready for this? What if he thinks it’s just what he’s supposed to do? Clarke loves Madi, and they get along, but it hasn't been easy, reaching this point.

“So, today at three-thirty?” she asks.

“At the office.”

“Great. See you then.”

*

Madi has school and then soccer practice, which means Clarke won’t actually see her until around six o’clock, and won’t have the chance to tell her about the meeting until after it’s happened. It still feels like keeping secrets, but Clarke knows it isn’t; she’s not doing anything wrong. 

Her concentration is still shot, though, and she spends her morning on the phone with Wells, even though, as he repeatedly points out, he isn’t really this kind of lawyer, and then with her actual lawyer, once Wells has gotten tired and hung up on her.

It’s not impossible for her to keep Madi after this, but she does think the whole world is going to be focused on telling her she’s a bad person for it. There’s so much emphasis put on biological families; trying to take a kid from her uncle feels like something the villain in a cartoon does.

But Madi doesn’t know her uncle. Madi knows Clarke. Clarke had her first.

She shows up at child services fifteen minutes early, tries to scope out which of the people around might be Madi’s uncle. It’s always busy, but there aren’t as many single guys around, so it feels kind of achievable. None of them look like Madi, but what would that even mean? She doesn’t think she’d pick her parents out of a lineup to be related to her, let alone her aunt or uncle.

She watches an attractive guy with curly black hair talk to the receptionist, trying to see hints of Madi in his features, but she’s still startled when Luna comes out to shake his hand. Even thinking it could be him, she hadn’t really believed it.

Luna looks around and spots her watching them, waves her over. The guy is a few years older than Clarke is, probably, and just as attractive up close, face covered in freckles and glasses slightly askew. He clearly came from work, judging from the crisp button-down and slacks, and tried to make himself look a little less formal, but Clarke can see a tie sticking out of his pocket, like he took it off and stuffed it in there at the last minute.

"This is Madi's foster mother, Clarke Griffin," Luna tells the man. "Clarke, this is Madi's uncle, Bellamy Blake."

Clarke offers her hand, and he shakes. His grip is firm but not overpowering, his hand large and a little clammy.

It's a little comforting that he's nervous too. "Nice to meet you, Ms. Griffin."

"Clarke is fine."

"Clarke," he says. He's got a nice voice, and if he wasn't trying to ruin her life, he'd be making a good impression. "Thanks for meeting with me."

She didn't have a choice, but she bites back on actually saying that. "Yeah, of course."

"Why don't we go into my office to talk?" Luna suggests. "Get some privacy."

Usually, when Clarke's in Luna's office, she's with Madi, at least these days, and it feels like sneaking around to be there alone. Bellamy offers her first pick of the chairs, and she takes the left one, while he takes the right. He looks about as tense as she feels, which is at least a comfort. If he's nervous, he's probably taking this seriously.

"So, Bellamy, you're interested in adopting Madi," says Luna, tone unreadable, and Clarke hopes she doesn't actually flinch.

He wets his lips, leaning forward. "I'd like to meet her. I know it's not exactly--just because we're related doesn't mean I'm the best person to take her, but she's my niece. I'd like to be a part of her life."

"What about her mother?" Clarke asks. "Does the whole family want to be involved?"

"No. O doesn't--she was sixteen, when she had the baby. I didn't even know about it." He rubs his face, lets out a harsh breath. "I'm not going to try to make her be a parent or anything."

"So you take her and she never meets your sister?"

"Clarke," says Luna, but Bellamy shakes his head.

"I'm not saying it wouldn't be weird," he says. "But--I don't see my sister much, these days. She's in Germany, and she's not really planning on moving back any time soon. And Madi's thirteen, right? I assume she already knows she has a birth mother somewhere who couldn't take care of her. That's still true."

"Obviously our top priority is Madi's happiness and comfort," Luna tells Clarke, with a smooth smile. "This is just a preliminary meeting so we can come up with a plan. We all want Madi to have a permanent home and a family, and if Bellamy is interested in being that home, that's something we need to take into consideration. So this is just coming up with next steps. Bellamy wants to meet Madi, and I think that's a good idea. We'll put a halt on the adoption process while we figure this out, but--"

"Adoption process?" Bellamy asks, attention snapping to Clarke. "You're adopting her?"

"I was."

It comes out too sharp, but Bellamy doesn't flinch. He's just watching her, eyes wary, like he's trying to figure her out, and Clarke doesn't let herself look away. She has nothing to hide.

Luna takes over again, and between the three of them, they get a meeting set up for the upcoming weekend. Luna won't be present, but she'll be in touch with everyone, figuring out the timeline and seeing how things are going. For now, she wants Bellamy to get to know Madi, to figure out if he wants to be her parent, and Clarke knows this is protocol, but it still makes her bristle, the assumption that Bellamy will be _better_ for Madi, by virtue of his being related to her. Instead of Clarke being on track to adopt her, now she's back to being temporary lodging while some unknown guy decides if he wants to be a parent or not.

"Hey, Clarke," he says, before she can finish storming out of the building in a huff. "Wait a second, okay?"

She stops, turning on him with a whirl. "Yes?"

His jaw is set, his expression tight. "When do you need to be home?"

It's not the question she was expecting. "Five-thirty?"

"Can I buy you a coffee?" he asks. "Just--I feel like it would help if we talked for a few minutes without all this bureaucracy." His smile goes crooked. "Sit down and just be two people who care about Madi?"

"You don't even know her," she snaps, and he shrugs.

"I can still care about her. She's my niece."

He's going to be a fact of life for a while; they might as well talk. "There's a coffee place across the street."

"Perfect," he says, and holds the door open for her as they leave.

*

"I didn't know you wanted to adopt her," Bellamy says, once they've got their drinks and found a table. "I found out she was in foster care, and I know it's hard for kids her age in the system. Not a lot of people want to adopt thirteen year olds. I figured she was going to be waiting to age out."

A lump forms in her throat, but she doesn't know how to just ask if this means he'll let it go. He could have led with that, if he was going to say it.

"How did you find out about her?" she asks instead. "Did your sister just bring it up out of the blue?"

"No, nothing like that. Our mom passed away a few months ago, I've been going through all her old papers. Octavia was underage, so my mom signed off on it. She still had the records." He scrubs his face. "Honestly, I was so pissed she was dead, I wanted to fucking yell at her for not telling me in the first place."

"That's why you were pissed she was dead?" she asks, amused in spite of herself.

"We had a pretty complicated relationship. Obviously I was sad about it, but--jesus, I couldn't believe my sister had a kid and they never even told me. O said that was her call, when I asked her about it. Mom's the one who didn't want her to get rid of the baby, but Octavia thought that if I knew, I'd fly back from Italy and quit school to take care of it myself."

"Italy?"

"Junior year of college, I was studying abroad."

"Would you have left?"

"I would have deferred so I could be around for the pregnancy, yeah." He scratches the back of his neck, a nervous gesture. "I wouldn't have told her not to give the kid up for adoption, not if she had a good family for her, I don't think. But my mom wasn't always around that much, and I took care of O a lot when we were kids. I know why she thought I'd be self-sacrificing and overprotective."

Clarke can't help a small smile. "And now you're trying to get her out of foster care."

"I know it's weird. I wasn't even sure I had any legal standing, but I thought--" He looks down. "I thought she might not have anyone."

Her stomach churns, torn between discomfort and relief. He really does seem like a good guy. Someone who's just trying to do the right thing. And maybe Madi would like that. Maybe she wants someone else to take care of her.

But maybe it doesn't have to be an either/or situation. If Bellamy's local and wants to be involved in her life, it doesn't have to be a bad thing. Clarke doesn't have to get knocked out of this.

"So, what do you want?" she finally asks.

"To meet Madi. See how she's doing." He considers her. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I know there are a lot of shitty foster parents out there. I still want to check in on her. But I don't think we need to be enemies or anything. Right?"

"Probably not." Her phone buzzes, and she sees it's a text from Madi: _Can I stay at Sophie's for dinner? Her mom will drive me home. Back by nine. Homework is under control._

On the one hand, it feels as if she should tell Madi about the whole Bellamy situation as soon as possible. On the other, Madi will be in a bad mood if Clarke tells her not to get dinner with Sophie, and it's not like they're doing anything with the whole thing until Saturday anyway. And, on the third and most important hand, she wants to put it off. Everyone's going to be happier if they wait a little while.

She texts Madi that that's fine and looks at Bellamy, considering him. "Madi's going to have dinner with a friend. You want something alcoholic?"

He huffs a laugh. "Honestly? That sounds great. I know a place."

*

Clarke waits until the next afternoon, because Madi deserves some time to process, if she needs it, and Friday is an easier day of school to miss than Thursday, if they decide that a day off is warranted. Unexpected uncles merit a three-day weekend.

So, over dinner, she says, "Something happened yesterday."

Madi frowns, wary. "What?"

"I got a call from social services. Everything's okay," she adds, quickly. "At least so far. But someone's come forward, your birth mother's brother. He's interested in meeting you."

"My birth mother?" Her voice is blank with confusion, like she doesn't even remember the woman exists anymore. Clarke can't blame her, really; Octavia Blake's name wasn't even in the files Clarke saw. She's never been a factor in Madi's life.

"Your uncle, yeah. I guess their mom just passed away, and he found out about you when he was looking through her stuff. He was in college when you were born. He seems like a pretty good guy."

By this point, she knows Madi well enough that she can see the way her walls come back up, the way she closes herself off. "Oh?"

"As long as he thinks I'm taking good care of you, I don't think he's going to try to sue for custody, which would make our lives a lot easier. I know a lot of the time biological family is favored in those things, and I don't know how the adoption factors into it, but Luna was acting like he was going to be able to take you if he wanted. So it's a lot easier if he doesn't want to."

"I've never even met him," Madi says, the horror of it breaking through her guard. 

"Yeah, I know. I wasn't thrilled about it either. But he just found out that you were in foster care, he didn't know I wanted to adopt you. So it's probably going to be your call."

"My call?"

"We're meeting him on Saturday, I assume we'll spend some time together. If you think you'd rather live with him, I know he'd take you. But I still want you to live with me. This doesn't change anything except the timeline. It might take longer."

She nods, thinking it over. "Did he say anything about my mom?"

"Not a lot. She lives in Germany, so he doesn't see her that often. It's basically what we knew already," she adds, making her voice gentle. "She was sixteen when she had you, she wasn't ready to have a kid. And I still think she's not interested in being a mom."

"Yeah. But he wants to be a dad?"

It's an interesting question. "I don't know, but he definitely wants to make sure you're happy and healthy. I think if you were adopted and living with a family, he probably wouldn't have said anything, but he's a teacher, so he's probably met some foster kids and knows that being in the system can be rough."

"And you're not worried?"

"I'm a lot less worried than I was. I was freaking out most of yesterday."

Madi smiles a little. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"You were at school, and then practice, and then you wanted to have dinner with Sophie. He and I hung out and talked without Luna, that helped a lot. If we were having this conversation right after I met with him and Luna, I'd probably be panicking right now."

"But you think it's going to be okay?"

"Honestly, it might be nice. I like my uncle. If he wants to be your dad, I'll fight him, but--if he just wants to be your uncle, that might be good."

"And we're meeting him?"

"Yeah. I assume Luna's going to want you to meet with her to talk about it too, and we'll maybe set up time for you and Bellamy to meet one on one, if you're both interested in that."

"Bellamy?" she asks, voice quiet. "His name is Bellamy?"

"Yeah."

"And you're not just going to give me to him."

"Nope. This is your home for as long as you want it to be. And I think Bellamy will respect that. If he doesn't, I'll take him to court."

Madi nods, slow, thinking it over, but she seems to be reassured. "When are we meeting him?" she finally asks.

"Saturday. We're getting lunch."

"Will Luna be there?"

"No, just the three of us. We're going to check in with her after."

She lets out a breath. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"We can meet him. But I don't want to live with him."

If Clarke were a different kind of person, she might argue the point, tell Madi that it's okay if she changes her mind, decides she'd rather live with Bellamy than with Clarke after all. That would be the good, responsible thing.

But she loves Madi. She's not going to try to talk Madi out of loving her too. "Okay," she says. "We'll figure it out."

*

Bellamy's already at the restaurant when she and Madi arrive on Saturday. He's dressed more casually than the last time Clarke saw him, in a t-shirt and jeans, his hair even more of a mess than before. His smile when he sees them is bright, and Clarke has to push down an unwelcome surge of physical attraction. She's definitely not allowed to think Madi's uncle is hot. 

Okay, he's objectively hot, that's definitely a thing. But she's not supposed to feel his hotness on a personal level.

"Hey, Clarke, good to see you again," he says. "And you must be Madi," he adds, turning his attention to her. "Hi."

"Hi, Uncle Bellamy," she says, not making eye contact.

He doesn't seem fazed in the least. "Just Bellamy's okay, if that feels more comfortable. Whatever you want to call me. Is here okay to eat? I know me and Clarke decided without you."

"Yeah, I like it here. Clarke knows all my favorite places," she adds, pointed, and he seems to be biting back on a smile.

"Cool, I'm glad. Let's see if we can get seats."

Madi's staying quiet, so he and Clarke have to carry the conversation, at least to begin with. She already got a lot of his demographic information during their first meeting, but Madi doesn't know these things, so they talk about it again. He's thirty-three, teaches high-school history and government, is bisexual and currently single, like Clarke, and owns two cats.

"I thought they'd be happier like that," he explains. "I just assumed they'd be friends, but all they want to do is hiss at each other. It's probably still more exciting than being alone, but not like I pictured."

Madi doesn't even crack a smile, and Clarke's heart actually aches for him. "I have seen pictures of cats liking each other. I think it happens."

"They're probably fake. Photoshopped or something."

"Fake cat news."

He snorts. "Exactly." 

The conversation lulls, and to Clarke's surprise, it's Madi who says, "Will you tell me about my mom?"

Even more surprisingly, Bellamy winces. "I'm not here for--this isn't about her," he says, careful. "I can tell you about my sister, but--I'm really sorry, but she's never wanted kids, and I don't think she ever will. Even if you want me to be part of your life, it's never going to be like that for her. She's never going to be a mother to you."

"Why did she have me?"

"Madi," Clarke says, warning, and Madi looks up from her plate to glare.

"I know she didn't have to. So I want to know why she did."

Bellamy shifts a little, clearing his throat. "I'm not going to say I'm an expert here. O didn't ever tell me about getting pregnant. But I assume she had you because she was living at home and Mom wouldn't take her to get it taken care of. I would have, if I'd been around, but I guess she decided she'd rather have a kid than call me and ask me to come home and take her to Planned Parenthood."

"I think I would have called you," Madi says, sounding dubious, and Bellamy actually laughs.

"If I wasn't in Italy, I think she probably would have. But--look, I get why you want to know this. I asked my mom the same question when I was a kid."

Madi does not look convinced. "Really?"

"Yeah, when I was eleven or twelve. It wasn't exactly hard to figure out that I wasn't planned, any more than Octavia was. And she did her best, but--she really wasn't ready to have kids. I think she was hoping my dad would stick around, and then that O's dad would, but they didn't. And then she just had two kids and no support."

"What did she tell you?"

"That she'd screwed up, and she would live with the consequences. Which really wasn't a great way to think of myself, but--" He sighs. "I wish I could tell you something better. My sister didn't mean to get pregnant, but she put her foot down about you having a better life than she could give you. My mom kept a lot of the paperwork, so I know some of what happened. They looked so hard for a great family for you, and I'm--I wish they'd had more of a chance to be good for you. The people who adopted you."

"And that's why you want to adopt me? Because you don't need to. Clarke is good for me."

His smile goes soft. "I just want you to be happy, I promise. If you're good with Clarke, I'm not going to make trouble for you guys. But you're still my family, if you ever need me."

"That's it?"

"It's up to you. You're old enough to know what you want."

"Even if what you want might not be right," Clarke teases, and Madi glares at her again.

"Whose side are you on?"

"I'm just saying, I look back on what I was into when I was thirteen and--"

"I get it, you're old." Bellamy's still just smiling as he watches, and Clarke thinks that probably helps as much as anything. The way he's not trying to get involved.

Maybe Madi thinks so too, because she adds, "If you want to see me sometimes, I don't mind. I just don't want you to try to take me away from Clarke."

"Deal," he says. "I know a good ice cream place a few blocks away. You want dessert?"

Madi nods, and Bellamy cocks his head at Clarke, somewhere between asking permission and gauging interest.

"Ice cream would be good," she says, and her stomach lurches again when he smiles.

As problems go, mild attraction to Bellamy is a lot better than what she thought she'd be dealing with. He's not trying to take Madi, and Madi seems to be feeling okay about the whole thing. She can just ignore the attraction.

It's probably going to be fine.

*

Bellamy becomes a part of their lives slowly, with patience and shockingly little drama. Every other week, he'll text Clarke with something he's planning to do and ask if she and Madi are interested in joining him, and Madi tends to either say yes or suggest something else, which is honestly more encouragement than Clarke was expecting him to get. He makes sure to get Clarke out of adoption limbo fairly quickly, rescinds any objections that were made on his behalf and lets the process move forward, but Clarke still can't help feeling a little on edge every time she screws up. When Madi had no one else, it was easy to feel like she was the best option, but Bellamy's good with her, good with kids, smart and capable and helpful. He'd probably be a good parent.

Which is why she doesn't want to ask him parenting questions. He seems like a great resource, but the last thing she wants is for him to think that he should be fighting her for custody. She's a good parent, but she's not perfect.

After three drinks when Madi is at a sleepover, she decides she should tell him that, too.

He picks up on the first ring, sounding confused. "Clarke? What's up?"

"I'm a good mom. Foster mom. Potential mom. Whatever!"

There's a pause. "You are, yeah. Are you drunk?"

"Kind of. Madi's not home, so it's okay."

"Yeah? Where is she?"

The question is casual, but Clarke still bristles. "She's at a friend's house. I have her name and her number and if she needs to come home I'll get her a cab and sober up. I can."

"I'm sure you can. Is there a reason you're calling me?"

"To tell you I'm a good mom."

"I know you're a good mom, Clarke. How much have you had to drink?"

"Not that many, my tolerance is shot. It's fine."

"Uh huh. I'm on my way over, have water, okay?"

She squawks, indignant. "You don't have to come over! Madi's _fine_ , I told you."

"I'm not worried about Madi. Seriously, water, okay? I'll be there in forty minutes. You want anything?"

“I knew I shouldn’t have called you.”

“I’m glad you want to hang out when you’re drunk. See you soon.”

It’s late enough there isn’t any traffic, so he makes it in only half an hour, and Clarke has to remind herself very, very firmly that he’s not here to be hot, because he really _is_ stupidly attractive, even if he didn’t bother changing out of his pajama pants. 

Although he did bring a duffel bag. That's kind of exciting.

“Did you drink water?” he asks.

“No, I had another beer.”

“Jesus. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

He scowls at her. “Try again.”

“You can’t tell Luna.”

It takes him a second. “The social worker? Why would I tell her?”

“Because you’d do better as a parent. It’s cool, I get it. You’re, like, the alpha dad. It’s impressive. I know I’m not on your level.”

“You’re a great mom, Clarke. I’m not trying to get Madi away from you. She loves you.”

“She’s having trouble with English.”

“The class?”

“Yeah. The teacher called.”

“And you didn’t want to tell me? Because you thought I’d tell Luna?” He rubs his face. “Jesus. I’m here for both of you, okay? If you need someone to talk to, just call me. Non-drunk.”

“You’d be a really good dad. You’d be good for Madi.”

“I’m good for Madi now, right? I thought she liked me.”

“She does.”

“Okay, so—sit down, I’m getting dizzy watching you sway. Have some water, tell me about the English stuff. What’s she doing? I’m a good teacher resource.”

Clarke collapses into the couch, feeling vaguely miserable, but also slightly better, somehow. “You’re a good general resource.”

“Yeah. So you should use me.” He sits down next to her and nudges a bottle of water into her hand. “Before you get wasted, next time.”

“I like getting drunk.”

“Fine, before you get sad drunk. I’m not testing you,” he says, soft. “I’m not waiting for you to fuck up. I keep telling you, I just wanted to make sure Madi was happy. She’s happy with you, so—“ He smiles. “I want to help. I like being Uncle Bellamy.”

“You’re good at it.” She takes a long drink of water. “You really didn’t have to come all the way out here.”

“I wasn’t doing anything else. And I wanted to witness drunk Clarke in person.”

“You know we got a drink the first day we met, right?”

“Just one. You were fine.” He nudges her shoulder. “Come on. Vent at me. I’m ready.”

She starts with the English and gets into her general insecurities, airing out a year of parental stress while Bellamy drinks a beer and makes sympathetic noises, and by the time she’s done she feels about thirty pounds lighter and two-and-a-half beers soberer.

“Thanks,” she says.

He smiles. “No problem. You’re a great mom, Clarke.”

“Yeah?”

“Definitely.” He stretches. “I’m sleeping on your couch, by the way. Want to watch something?”

It's been a while since Clarke had a casual night in with a friend--most of hers are long-distance now, which is part of why she decided to start fostering kids in the first place--and it's refreshing, as helpful to stress reduction as venting all her anxiety was.

"Is it okay if I spend the night?" he asks, after a couple episodes of _Bob's Burgers_. "No is an acceptable answer, I can go home, but--"

"If you don't mind the couch, sure. I turned the guest room into Madi's room, and I don't think she wants you taking her bed. Even if she's not using it."

"Couch is fine, yeah." He stands and stretches, offers her a hand up. His hands are so fucking _warm_ , and she's maybe just a little bit too drunk, still. "You feel better?" he asks.

The smile, at least, is easy. "Yeah, thanks."

*

She thinks about sending him home before Madi gets back, but it feels kind of stupid. Madi had a sleepover, and so did Clarke. Just because _sleepover_ starts sounding like a euphemism after a certain age, that doesn't mean it's wrong. 

So he stays and makes breakfast for the two of them, and when Madi gets back, they're on the couch, Bellamy with some papers he brought and Clarke with a book.

"Did we have plans?" Madi asks, wary.

"No, I got drunk and called him and he decided he needed to come make sure I wasn't dead."

"You got drunk?" 

"I like drinking."

She gets her shoes off and her stuff put in her room and comes back into the living room, pushing Clarke into the middle seat either because she doesn't want to sit next to Bellamy or because she wants Clarke to. Either way, it's kind of nice. She didn't really think Madi would be upset, but it feels nice to have Bellamy just around, with no particular excuse except that he's their friend, and friends hang out.

Still, after he heads home, Madi demands, "Did you guys have sex?"

"No," says Clarke. "He slept on the couch."

"Was it a date?"

"So, first question is sex, and then date?"

"You didn't say no."

"It wasn't a date. He just came over to hang out."

"That's never happened before either. You don't have friends over. You barely have friends."

"Wow, thanks. You're really doing well with this conversation. What are you trying to get out of this, exactly?"

"I dunno. Do you like him? Bellamy."

"Obviously."

She rolls her eyes. "You know what I mean. _Like_ him. I don't mind if you do," she adds.

"No?"

"I don't know. It's kind of weird, but--he's sticking around anyway, right? And I like him. It would kind of make sense."

"Make sense?"

"Just, you know--easy."

Clarke has to laugh. "Easy?"

"He's already kind of family."

"Yeah, that's not _easy_. That means if it went wrong, it would suck. I'm not going to date your uncle and screw up your life."

"I never needed an uncle before. I could lose him."

"I want you to have more people, Madi, not lose them."

She shrugs. "So don't lose him."

Clarke has to smile. "Yeah, that's not really how it works. I can't just decide that. Relationships are pretty unpredictable."

"I could always just see him without you. If it went _that_ wrong."

It’s actually a much bigger deal than Madi being okay with her going out with him, as far as Clarke's concerned. Dating is all well and good, but Madi likes Bellamy enough and believes he likes her enough that they could maintain an independent relationship. To her relief, it only makes her happy to realize it, doesn’t make her think Bellamy deserves to keep Madi instead of her.

If anything happens to her, Madi will still have him. For a kid who’s been left alone so often, that has to be a big deal.

“Nothing is going on with me and Bellamy,” she says, firm. “Maybe it will, I don’t know. But I’ll let you know if it does.”

“Okay, well, consider this my official permission for you to date. I assume you wanted that. I think it should be Bellamy, but that’s up to you.”

“Thanks,” she says, dry. “I’m glad I still get to pick my partners.”

"You know what I mean. I thought it would be weird, but this was actually fun, hanging out. We'd be okay. If you wanted to go out with Bellamy. And if you want to go out with someone else, he can babysit me while you're on dates."

"So, we're keeping him, huh?" she asks.

"He's not going anywhere," says Madi, with a shrug. "So yeah, we might as well keep him."

*

Obviously, Clarke wasn't actually waiting for Madi's permission to have a thing for Bellamy, but between his reassurance that he's never going to try to take Madi from her and Madi's reassurance that Clarke can date people if she wants, it's hard to pretend she's not interested. The difficulty is in being sure that her interest is, for lack of a better term, _honest_. The attraction is easy, but there are plenty of attractive people in the world Clarke doesn't like as much as she likes Bellamy. But there aren't many people who are so involved in her life, whose values line up so well with hers. Like Madi said, it _would_ be easy, convenient. Her uncle appears out of nowhere, is helpful and kind and attractive, and if the custody dispute wasn't already settled, they could just do the rom-com thing and get married so Madi didn't have to chose between them.

He'd fit so well into her life, it's hard to be sure she's not just taking the easy path, developing feelings for him. 

So she starts actually looking for dates, letting Bellamy take Madi for a night or two while she goes out to bars, flirts, remembers what it's like to be a person who might have a romantic life.

She doesn't actually meet anyone she likes more than Bellamy, or even close to as much, but that helps too. It was easy to feel like he was a default crush, the first person who could be a romantic interest in a while, but other people really _don't_ measure up. 

He's kind of the best, honestly. Which doesn't mean she knows what to do about those feelings, but she at least doesn't feel guilty about them anymore. She likes _him_. It's staggering and complicated and simple all at once, but at least it's not just some kind of default position.

By the time summer vacation rolls around, she thinks they're as good as they can be without her and Bellamy making out. She gave up on the dating after a few months, and now she, Bellamy, and Madi have settled into something like a stable family unit. She's officially adopted Madi, Bellamy remains happy with his position as somewhat over-involved uncle, and Madi has someone else to hang out with when Clarke's busy with work and her friends aren't around.

So when Bellamy asks if he can come over when Madi isn't around, she can't help being a little excited. It could be good news. 

But she should have learned from the Luna thing. Optimism doesn't work.

He hands her a bottle of rum and says, "My sister's going to be in town next month."

Clarke's blood runs cold and then boils, the sudden emotional shifts so intense that her body must think she's dying. "Your sister."

"Yeah. She asked if--she knows how much time I'm spending with Madi, she asked what she should be doing. And, fuck, I don't know. I figured we could get drunk and try to figure it out."

"Sounds perfect."

They don't talk about it again until they're on the couch with drinks, and even then, Clarke doesn't really know what to say. She's heard a good deal about Bellamy's sister by this point, and it's easy to not really think of her as _Madi's mother_ , most of the time. Because she's not, in any sense except the biological one. Being a mother has never been a part of Octavia Blake's life, so it's not in any of Bellamy's stories, any of his memories of her. She had a baby, she gave it away, and that was the end of it for her. He didn't even know.

"Does she want to meet Madi?" Clarke finally asks.

"I don't think she cares. That sounds bad," he adds, before she can say it. "Not, like--she doesn't know what the fuck to do, she just wants to do whatever's--best, I guess? Jesus, I don't know. It's about Madi, O will be fine with whatever we decide."

"It feels like we shouldn't be encouraging her to care about it," Clarke admits. "But it's not like I'm not curious about her too."

"I always wanted my mom to tell me about my dad," says Bellamy, sounding a little wistful. "I thought that if I knew about him, I'd make more sense to myself. I wanted everything."

"What do you know about him?" she asks. It's one of the things she can't relate to, can't imagine; her parents are her parents. She's always known them. It's weird to remember that Bellamy doesn't know his father, that Madi's is still a mystery to all of them too. It's easy for her to say it doesn't matter, but it would probably nag at her too. It's not a sign that she's not enough. It's not even a little bit personal. Anyone would be curious.

"Not much. He and my mom didn't really date, just hooked up for a few weeks. When she told him she was pregnant, she thought he'd want to make an honest woman of her, but he didn't, and she basically wrote him off. Not that I blame her, but--it was definitely tough, growing up with everyone knowing I didn't have a dad. I made up all sorts of stories about him, but no one bought it."

"So, if you were Madi, you'd want to meet Octavia?"

"I'd definitely want to, I just don't know if it would have actually been a good idea."

"Just because it's a bad idea doesn't mean we shouldn't let her do it."

"I know. I just--I don't want O to hurt her."

Clarke smiles. "You think she will?"

"Not on purpose. But sometimes I wonder if she'd be better off if I never tracked her down."

"Madi?"

He shrugs. "Octavia gave her up, maybe she'd be happier never remembering--"

"She loves you, Bellamy." When he looks down, Clarke moves closer, nudges his shoulder. "She does. And she doesn't have a ton of people who love her. Octavia was always--she knew her mom gave her up, and I think she gets why. But I'm pretty sure it's nice for her, having you. And it's great for me, so--"

He laughs. "Yeah, I provide a valuable service."

"You do, though," she says. "I'm not saying we'd be lost without you, we'd be fine, but considering how pissed I was when Luna told me Madi's uncle showed up--"

"But you hid it so well," he teases.

"I thought you were going to take her away."

"I know." His eyes sweep over her, and Clarke realizes suddenly how close they are, her whole body lighting up with awareness of him, his warmth, his smell, his hands on his glass.

She's in love with him, probably. That's got to be the right name for how she feels when she looks at him.

He's the one to break the moment, clearing his throat and looking away. "I'm glad she's got you. You're really good for her, Clarke."

"Yeah, she's doing okay. And I think we have to tell her," she adds. "About Octavia. She knows--it's not like she's going to think Octavia is coming here to adopt her or anything. But it was never a closed adoption, it's not like she couldn't have tracked her down if she wanted to someday. I would have helped her, if she asked. She's old enough she gets to make that choice herself."

"I know." He shifts a little. "I do, uh--I love her so much, you know? Not just because she's O's daughter. She's such a great kid and I'm really grateful you let me be part of the family."

"We're really happy to have you." It's too much of too many feelings, and she takes a pointed gulp from her glass. "We're not drunk enough for this."

"Definitely not. Drink more, watch TV, ignore this until we have to tell Madi?"

"Perfect, yeah." She pauses, and then moves in, leaning against his shoulder, relaxing when he puts his arm around her at once. "I'm really glad you found us."

"Yeah, me too."

*

"So, are you into my brother?"

It's weird, looking at Octavia Blake. Between Bellamy and Madi, there's plenty of family resemblance, and it feels like finishing a magic eye puzzle or something, everything snapping into focus.

Bellamy's bringing Madi by after she's done at the park; for now, it's just Clarke and Octavia, and while the question isn't a surprise, it does make anger flash through her, red and hot.

"That's your question?"

"I'm pretty sure he's into you, and you guys are playing happy families, so, yeah, that's my question. I know you love Madi and you're taking care of her and I'm glad, but I don't know what's going on with you and Bell."

The pang of hurt is as unexpected as the flash of anger over Madi was predictable. Bellamy calls his sister _O_ , of course she'd have a nickname for him too. But there's so much she doesn't know about him.

"I didn't really come here to gossip. I just want to make sure--"

"He already lectured me about Madi." Her tough facade falters, and for a second, she looks like a nervous kid, and so like her daughter. "I just want to do what's right for her, okay? That's all I ever wanted. If you think I shouldn't meet her--"

"No, that's not--" She sighs. "I think we're all being pretty paranoid. She'll be happy to meet you, and she's not expecting you to be her mom or anything. I don't think we have to stress out."

"Cool. So, my brother!" she says, kind scarily bright. "If you break his heart, I'll definitely fly back out here just to kick your ass."

Clarke takes a deliberate sip of her coffee. "So if I'm going to do it, I should do it now? So you don't have to take another trip."

For a second, she's worried, but then Octavia laughs, shaking her head. "Wow, no wonder he likes you so much. That's just what he'd say."

"And he'd be pissed you were having this conversation with me."

"Yeah, but I'm just here for a week. I can't meddle naturally like I want to, so I'm just putting it out there. You don't have to be into him, but I think he's pretty great, and he thinks you're amazing."

It feels weird to talk with a virtual stranger about the person who's basically become her best friend in the last seven months and change, like it's cheating to tell Octavia how she feels before she tells Bellamy.

But she has to say _something_ , settles on, "I think he's pretty amazing too, yeah."

Octavia's smile is warm and surprisingly not smug. "Cool. That's what I thought."

*

"We should have bought movie tickets," Bellamy says, dropping his head against the back of the couch with a sigh. They're in his apartment, a few blocks away from Octavia and Madi, who are having a private conversation in the coffee shop. "Or something."

"We could just watch a movie here."

"But then we're not required to turn off our phones."

"I'm not turning off my phone, Madi might need to get out."

If everything goes well, they're all getting dinner after this, and Clarke thinks it probably will. Madi's meeting a relative, and on an intellectual level, Clarke gets that it feels like she's a really important relative, but weirdly enough, it seems most likely that Octavia Blake will settle into being something like a cool aunt, someone she sees sometimes and likes, but doesn't really interact with often.

Which would put Bellamy pretty firmly in _Dad_ territory. It feels right, Clarke has to admit.

"I know it's going to be fine," he says, with a sigh. "O's good, Madi's good, but--"

"It's your sister and your niece and it's stressful."

"Something like that."

She bites the corner of her mouth, watching him. It's not just the conversation with Octavia, although that does help. Mostly, it feels like a big day, and it's worth getting all of the things she's nervous about out in the open.

"We could make out," she says, and he startles so hard her actually jumps, staring at her wide-eyed.

"What?"

"Your sister asked me my intentions, and I felt weird telling _her_ , but--" Her voice falters, and she just looks at him. "Come on, Bellamy, you must know that I--how I--"

"Not a clue," he says, with a sharp laugh. "Really?"

"You're kind of great."

His eyes dart over her, like he's checking for strings or something. "What about Madi?" he finally asks, and she laughs.

"She gave me her blessing months ago."

"Oh. So I can just--"

She kisses him before he can finish, and he tugs her in, arms firm and warm, and for a second she feels nothing but profound, stupid relief.

Then she remembers she's kissing Bellamy, and she has way better things to be feeling than relief.

"Just to be clear," he murmurs, hands sliding up her back, tugging her close. "I'm really fucking into you. I don't just need something to distract me while O and Madi are busy."

"I figured, yeah. Same." She pushes him back. "I still want to distract you, though."

He grins up at her, bright and beautiful, and she hopes Madi's day is going as well as hers, because she's going to have trouble keeping her smile in. "Please," he says, and Clarke lets herself stop thinking for a while.

*

"So, how are you feeling?" Clarke asks.

It's just her and Madi for the next hour or so; Bellamy is dropping his sister off at his place and then coming back to check in and spend the night, which he'll do on the couch, if Madi doesn't seem ready for relationship updates, but Clarke is hoping it won't be an issue. She seems pretty good.

"Okay," she says, careful. "It's still kind of weird, but more like--I don't know. She's just a person, you know? It's weird that she's my mom, but she's not really my mom."

"She's your aunt."

Madi glances at her. "That makes Bellamy my dad, you know."

"He pretty much is, right? He's my boyfriend."

"You definitely just wanted an excuse to say that. Since when?"

"Since today."

"Wow, that took so long. But good for you, I guess. Were you so stressed out about me and Octavia that you had to distract yourself?"

"Kind of. Also, he's really great and I like him a lot. Is that still okay?"

"Really not a surprise. As long as you guys are happy."

"If it's ever not okay--"

"I know. I'll tell you."

"So--I don't want to jinx it, but this seems like a good day," she offers. "You met your mom, I got a boyfriend, nothing went that wrong."

"And Bellamy's coming back to hang out?"

"Yeah, he wants to make sure you're good."

"And be your boyfriend."

"I think those are his two priorities, yeah. That's not bad, right? That's what we want him to do: take care of you and be my boyfriend."

"Pretty much, yeah." Madi burrows into her side, and it's suddenly easy to notice how different she is, taller and heavier than the small, scared girl Clarke picked up almost two years ago, and more confident too. It took so long for Madi to be sure of her place in Clarke's life, of Clarke's affection, and now she's sure of not only Clarke, but Bellamy, and probably Octavia. She sees exactly how she fits in. "It was pretty good," she offers. "That he found us."

"We were fine on our own," she says, just in case it's a test. "We'd still be fine." She can't keep it up; they're happy, and Bellamy isn't going anywhere, so she leans her head on Madi's, closing her eyes. "But, yeah. This is better."

"Definitely better," she agrees, and they settle in to wait for the last member of the family to come home.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm gonna be at Unity Days this weekend, so if you're there, you can find me and say hi! Or not. I'm like super awkward. It's cool.


End file.
